


Fighter Pilot

by GabrielsCake



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Adam-Centric, M/M, Mentions of Other Voltron Paladins, Shiro (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, kind of an OC - Freeform, lots of headcanons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-20
Updated: 2018-09-20
Packaged: 2019-07-14 17:55:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16045595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GabrielsCake/pseuds/GabrielsCake
Summary: the 'Adam is alive' headcanon/AU we all deserve, with gore and angst and evident trauma. (and a happy ending)





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> this will be kind of in bullet point form. At least, the paragraphs will be very short.   
> also, since we have less Adam scenes than Kaltenecker scenes and therefore less canon info about him, most of his personality is my own headcanons.   
> also noteworthy: I try to put in funny remarks to relieve y'all of the heavy feelings, I'm sorry if you find that annoying.

-Adam had accepted Takashi's death a long time ago. It hurt, but he eventually learned to look back on the times he and his love had shared with peace instead of pain.   
-So when he heard a knock on his door while sitting back on the couch one lazy Friday evening, he didn't know what to feel, seeing Sam Holt back from the dead with new scars and a sad but determined look in his eyes.  
-Sam didn't hesitate to tell Adam everything, from being captured by aliens to coming back with an empire humanity can't yet imagine.  
-when Sam got to the part about Shiro escaping the gladiator pits, Adam realized just how hard he'd been gripping his teacup.   
-from that point on, most of his thoughts were replaced with something like, "FUCCKKK"  
-so when he and his fighter pilot friends got the call to go out and kick some Galra ass, he was thinking, "FUCCKKK but also I wanna have a world Takashi can have a future in, possibly a future including myself"  
-then his ship got shot, and everything went downhill.  
-he sure felt it when the enemy gunfire hit him, sending glass and shrapnel into the cockpit, but then the world tipped over and he no longer knew which way is up.  
-The world stopped spinning but the dizzy feeling didn't.   
-So now he's chilling in the destroyed cockpit of his fighter jet, struggling to breathe and it's dark, so dark and his only thoughts are on how his sisters are gonna be so worried and Takashi's not here  
-then he hears something, like people's voices.   
-There's blood running down his throat so the only thing he can manage to croak is, "...help me...please..."  
-now he's being unbuckled from the seat, someone's lifting him out of the cockpit telling him everything's going to be alright, and the voice along with everything else fades away into the deep ocean of sleep. 

-Since 95% of this fic is centered around Adam I'm blessing y'all with one lil update on the fact that Shiro is  
-Not Doing Well.  
-He started to go into the five stages of grief a while ago but he's stuck at the depression stage, the poor man. help him  
-He used to only listen to classical music to help clear his mind and keep himself focused but   
-now he's just willing to listen to anything loud or energetic enough to distract himself.  
-You'd think he's got the coping with trauma thing down by now but while he used to be great at getting shit done because he was scared of what the Galra would do to him or his family, but now that the fight is mostly over, the fear that gave him motivation just  
-stops.  
-and he's lost.


	2. II

-Adam wakes up, cold as shit. It's still dark as fuck but he feels warm bodies huddling around him. There are voices whispering, some in languages he's never heard before. All of them are scared.  
-A heavy door creaks open and the voice who carried him out of his fighter jet rises above the others  
-and says  
-"Welcome to hell."  
-he thinks for a second that he's dead and he really made it to hell and he wonders what his mother will think of him and what Takashi would think of him and remembers the one uncle who preached that Adam would burn in hell for loving a man and wonders if his uncle was right after all.  
-but a voice to his right that doesn't sound quite  
-doesn't sound quite human  
-asks what happened to them, what will happen to them and the big voice says, "The Galra see you as slaves, gladiators now. That is all that matters. I will train you to survive, to live or die fighting. Things from now on will hurt, and I will teach you to fight trough the pain. They will cut you down, and I will rebuild you. Understand?"  
-Adam doesn't know how he's supposed to fight anything when it's so fucking dark when a hand is on his shoulder and the same voice says, much closer than before, "The blind one. Poor little human, I'll pay special attention to you."  
-then it hits him that he's lost his vision  
-and the only thing he feels is fear.

-Life becomes the way that voice said it would be.  
-A hand shakes him awake in what he assumes to be every morning, and every day he gets up to train with the being he now knows is called The Anathema by everyone else  
-but he asked the voice what she's called and she hesitates and replies, "Uhhhhhhhhh...Bob."  
-the voice sounds rather androgynous to Adam, but he calls Bob a she because after a while she's surprisingly maternal to him.  
-though at first Bob was as mean as everyone else around him, prisoners and Galra alike.   
-but when he survived his first battle she started actually being kind to him.  
-How Bob taught Adam to fight is rather interesting, because she taught him two main things:  
-first, fights are typically like a dance, so figuring out each opponents rhythm is key to figuring out their next move.  
-second, she taught him all about quintessence and how to detect it, feel it all around you.   
-this really works in the arena because when you're battling living things and robeasts powered by quintessence, all you gotta know is where they are and what they are, which Adam learns is the extent of his abilities.  
-So he learns to appreciate music a little more because it's saved his life in that arena more than once.   
-make no mistake, Bob pushes Adam harder than anyone else  
-For instance, training him to fight multiple opponents; with foreign objects in the way; opponents that teleport, etc.   
-Even teaching him to use his gymnastic skills from time to time.  
-In the most horrifying of ways, the Galra have gotten a little more creative with how they run the gladiator torture methods since Shiro escaped.  
-One of them must really like the Saw movies because remember the reverse bear trap? Oh yeah baby guess who's gotta go through that.   
-In detail:  
-Adam wakes up, already in the arena, which is a first. Hooked into his jaw and taking up all the space in his mouth is what feels like a huge metal contraption.  
-the Anathema is commentating this time. She talks directly to Adam, telling him that the bear trap will permanently pull his jaws apart unless he finds the key, hidden in the innards of any of the prisoners in the arena with him.   
-there's a little knife that feels more like a letter opener than a weapon, but finds all the prisoners and hacks at them as best he can, one by one, until he finds the key and unlocks the trap, his hands shaking and slippery with blood. He waits for a second after the trap is off, he's having trouble breathing again.  
-he doesn't smell anything but blood for three days afterward.  
-Adam doesn't know this, but the bear trap was a fake. It would never have gone off, but they made him think it would, driving him to desperate measures to preserve his own life.

-Once, he makes the mistake of asking why the Anathema pretends to care about him so much  
-and Bob says,  
-"I've been to Earth, you know. Many times. It's my favorite planet in all the galaxies. Years ago I even trained someone from Earth, a young man like you. He did wonderfully, earned himself the title of Champion. (I actually nicknamed him Bubblegum Bitch but that's a story for another day.) But this Champion did so well that Haggar paid special attention to him. See, he'd had a disease in his right arm, so she had it amputated and replaced with Galra tech. Then she cloned him, and used his own new arm to mind control him."  
-At this point Adam knows Bob's talking about Takashi   
-he can still hear Bob talking but he can't listen anymore because while he knew that Shiro was on a Galra prisoner ship Sam never told him about //this//.   
-he's still silently losing his mind when the Anathema says, "OK son it's time for bed."  
-Adam realizes just how scared he is, not being able to see anything ever in a place that wants to kill him  
-so, abandoning all trust issues he'd developed in prison, he hugs Bob tightly around the middle.   
-A little surprised, Bob hugs back.  
-From then on, she stands vigilant over him, protecting him while he sleeps. 

-On the best days, Adam thinks maybe he'll get out of here, get back to Earth.  
-But most days he's just grateful his family doesn't have to see him like this.   
-On the worst days, he dreams about Takashi, what they could have been.


	3. III

-Adam steps into the arena once again and feels right off the bat that his opponent is human  
-his entire train of thought is simply "shit shit shit shit shit shit shit" because he knows that all these fights are to the death so he's either gotta kill a dude or let himself die.  
-Then the fight starts and his opponent just hesitates for a hot long second  
-then says  
-"Hello, Adam darling, did you miss me?"  
-Now Adam is flipping his shit because it's Takashi Takashi Takashi Takashi  
-but something's very  
-very  
-wrong.  
-His Takashi is taunting him, telling him about how it's Adam's own fault that they're both stuck here, about how he resented Adam for leaving him when all he wanted to do was see the stars before he died  
-and there comes a point when Adam realizes that it's just a stupid clone,  
-but his heart still shatters when Adam plunges his sword into his lover's clone's neck.  
-the crowd is cheering, but Adam just laughs.  
-but that laughing quickly turns into desperate sobbing  
-and he can't seem to wipe the blood from his hands and it might be because he's tired physically and emotionally but he licks the blood from his palms like a fucking maniac  
-he refuses to move and they have to drag him from the arena.  
-Afterward Adam refuses to talk to anyone but Bob waves a plate of food in front of his face. Adam lifts his head so fast he cricks his neck  
-because the plate in front of him smells like chicken Parmesan with noodles, his favorite food in the world  
-he's immediately suspicious  
-Bob pets him on the head and says, "You earned it, buddy. Besides, you're not gonna get this again anytime soon."  
-he asks Bob how she knew it was his favorite and she says, "The same way I know you're left handed, you're gay, and your birthday is in late November. I only had to look at you when your jet was beamed up here to know that you're a picky eater."  
-he's scared now because all of that is true, but he's also far too tired to care.  
-he tries to keep his thoughts on enjoying a hot meal, but all he can think of is how it felt to kill the love of his life.  
-Before he retires for the night, Bob congratulates him on becoming the new Champion after killing the old one.

-after that, he's sent to kill as many clones of his beloved as there are stars in the universe.  
-He stops caring.  
-The other prisoners are already scared of him but they refuse to go near him altogether once he strangles someone for touching his shoulder without warning.  
-he keeps licking the blood from his hands after every kill, no matter the species.  
-he just doesn't care about anything anymore.  
-Bob still watches over him while he sleeps.

-One time, the fight between him and Shiro is different.  
this clone pretended to be nice and said he could save Adam from the arena.  
-Adam fell for it  
-hard.  
-he almost got stabbed in the back, literally, but Adam got out of the way in time for the clone to end up stabbing himself.  
-Adam doesn't forgive himself after that, and trusts no one except Bob, and not even completely.  
-So when the prisoners and guards alike start talking about Voltron and the old Champion, he's anxious to ask Bob about what happened to the old Champion.  
-Bob tells him the truth as she knows it, which is, "the Blade of Marmora helped him escape; he became leader of the most powerful weapon in the universe; Zarkon strangled him."  
-he doesn't want to believe it but has to because he remembers Sam Holt telling him about Voltron but  
-Adam already accepted his death once. Shattered hopes are worse than no hope at all.  
-He thinks for a minute, then holds his sword out to the Anathema, the blade pointing at himself  
-and asks her to kill him.  
-all she says is  
-"Why?"  
-that one word sets him off. "Because what's even the point? Earth is gone, my family is gone, my hope is gone, I have nothing left. There's no point in fighting anymore. there's nothing to fight for anymore. Don't you monsters see that? You have it all. All of it! So kill me before I do it myself!"  
-Bob gently takes the sword from him, sets it down, and asks, not unkindly, "Do you want to know why I've been teaching you to feel quintessence, keeping you alive?"  
-He answers, "So you can make me your pet, your trophy?"  
-"Because I am one of the few things on this ship that wants you alive, and I am the //only// thing on this ship that wants to get you back home without your own pair of Galra eyes and clones of yourself on your tail."  
-It's the first hint in who knows how long he's been here that Earth is actually safe.  
-he can breathe a little more evenly now.  
-the Anathema says, "Have you been feeling all the commotion around us lately? It's because there's one more battle for you. Play this game one more time and you'll never have to set foot in that arena ever again."  
-For the first time in what he later learns is almost a thousand days, Adam almost feels true hope.


	4. IV

I lied when I said there would be no more Shiro scenes.  
-The Atlas and Voltron have found Haggar.   
-Nobody really knows what she's doing, but we do know there's also a lot of what's left of the Blade of Marmora there too.  
-they're all on a gladiator ship that is headed toward Earth.  
-The team suggests Shiro doesn't go for fear of triggering a panic attack at the wrong moment that could kill him.  
-but he says "fuck that i already died" and goes anyway.  
-We all know Shiro has stopped caring about his own life.  
-The mission to deal with Haggar and go POW POW POW and free the prisoners goes quite well, until they're overwhelmed and the Atlas is fucking captured  
-The Atlas is a huge ass sip so it's really up to your imagination how she's able to fit inside a Galra prisoner vessel  
-but obviously Shiro is caught as well  
-Voltron barely manages to escape only because Shiro sacrifices himself for them to escape  
-told ya he stopped caring about his won life  
-I assume the MFE pilots are in on this too but since James smells like hot dog water I literally do not care what role they have to play in this fic.  
-Haggar sees this and instead of Immediately killing Shiro she thinks, "hey. What if I just...make him fight the new Champion? hmmmmmm"  
-Thus, that's just what he's gonna do.  
-Right before he's set to fight the new Champion, whoever the hell that is, the Anathema comes into his holding cell to see him.   
-Adam has never seen Bob before so he assumes she's Galra but while Shiro only knows her as the Anathema, he knows she actually looks human  
-but he knows she's not one.  
-She tells him, "Hey, Bubblegum Bitch, remember me?"  
-He just glares at her.  
-"Huh. No humor, just as I remember you. Anyway, I never got a chance to tell you this, but I know you hate me. And for that I'm sorry. But. Stay alive tonight, keep him alive, and maybe you won't.   
-he knows she's talking about the new Champion but now he's just confused.  
-then she says, "But if you kill him, Takashi..."  
-slightly unnerved that she knows his first name, he finishes for her. "What, you'll swear revenge on me and I'll hate you forever?"  
-She looks back at him with pity in her eyes while shutting the door. "No, buddy. If you kill him, you're gonna hate yourself."


	5. V

-Galra Showdown!!! Champion vs Bubblegum Bitch!!!!  
-in all seriousness though Adam is way more nervous than he's ever been  
-but now he has hope.  
-two guards try to grab him by the arms to drag him to the arena, but he waves them off, saying, "I'll carry myself."  
-because now he has hope.  
-Stepping into the arena, he feels Bob in the stands, next to something with what feels like tremendously powerful quintessence who the hell--  
-but he doesn't want to dwell on anything, except the fact that if he can get through this, he's going home.  
-Unless Bob is a liar and just wants him to stay alive a little bit longer.  
-the fight starts, and he's gripping his sword extra tight.  
-his opponent, who has a frighteningly familiar energy, stops for a whole ass hot minute.   
-and only moves to block himself when Adam takes advantage of this hesitation to strike a blow.  
-When his opponent whispers, "...Adam?" his heart sinks  
-because, right.  
-this is just another clone. One more cycle of having to kill the love of his life.   
-but what he thinks is clone Shiro doesn't switch from defense to offense at all. In fact, he's trying to run away from Adam. He says, "Just wait, we can get out of here."  
-Adam isn't having any of it because he's seen it all before: fake Shiro will plead and try to convince Adam he can get them out of this hell he's been living, trying to get Adam's guard down.   
-he doesn't realize he's laughing and crying at the same time until Adam says, "Oh, you're not going ANYWHERE."  
-Adam stabs his sword; Shiro ducks out of the way. "Adam, please, just listen to me!"  
-He chases after Shiro. "Sure, like you listened to me when I //told// you not to go on the mission. I BEGGED you not to leave me! I've seen all your excuses! You wanted to see the stars again, you wanted to leave a legacy, you wanted you wanted you wanted. But you still left me, Takashi."  
-Shiro stops. Adam kicks him in the face, and he stumbles backward. Spitting blood, Shiro says, loudly, "I only left because I didn't want you to watch me die!"  
-Adam screams, "BULLSHIT!" Because he can't trust this clone, no matter how much he wants to. He's so close to getting home. So close.   
-He strikes and stabs harder, but this particular clone must've had some additional training because he can't seem to get him to cave.   
-Then Takashi tosses his weapon aside.  
-Adam hears it clatter to the ground as Takashi whispers, "...my universe."  
-everything  
-stops.

-He freezes, sword in hand ready to kill, ready to get it over with and carry him back home because he's so close so close so close so close  
-but he can't move.  
-because he threw his sword away.  
-Adam breathes, "What?"  
-Takashi isn't moving, isn't attacking him.   
-he's only saying, "The last time I ever saw you, you asked how important you are to me. You're my universe, Adam. The whole time I was in space, I regretted everything. And when they said you died, I was just...I just hated myself for not telling you how sorry I am, how I'd do anything to just see you again. I'm sorry, but I still love you. I know I can't ask you to forgive me--"  
-while he's spilling his feelings out in a place that kills you if you even think of crying, Adam thinks over everything that's happened, from the 'commotion' the Anathema mentioned earlier to the being next to her now with the stupendously powerful energy.  
-And he threw his sword to the ground.   
-no clone ever threw their weapon away.  
-ever.  
-Takashi doesn't finish his sentence because Adam drops his own sword and tackles Shiro, holds him as tightly as he can. Both of them are sobbing and the crowd is losing their minds but all he cares about is Takashi Takashi Takashi Takashi  
-he had forgotten the best feeling in the world: being safe, safe and in love.


	6. VI

-Haggar, understandably, loses her shit after this.  
-She just wants to kill them both and get it all over with but the Anathema ain't having any of it  
-"nuh uh bby, you made me watch people die for your damn pleasure for half a century, you made your bed now SLEEP IN IT"  
-while an epic fight scene is brewing between the two of them, Shiro tells Adam that they've gotta get out of the arena fast because soon the entire crowd is gonna be on their tail  
-Shiro knows they're gonna be safe, especially when the Anathema brings out her own huge ass sword, wicked sharp as a tungsten needle (or Shiro's eyeliner--take your pick)  
-Haggar's teleporting all over the place, either getting away from Bob or to try and quickly kill Adam or Shiro.  
-the Anathema is faster.  
-In fact, Adam wonders why he never realized before now that Bob has way more quintessential energy than anyone thought.  
-She puts a hand on his shoulder one last time and says, I'm proud of you, son. Now, run."  
-Shiro pulls him out of the arena, through places on the ship Adam had never seen before. "We just need to get back to the Atlas, we'll figure something out from there. Voltron will be coming back for us any minute now, knowing Keith."  
-Adam signals to stop and hide from several rogue spectators looking to bring Adam and Shiro back as trophies. Then he realizes what Takashi just said. "Keith? Emo kid Keith?"  
-Adam's having the time of his life, dude  
-the two of 'em are scootin around the Galra ship, Shiro looking for the Atlas and watching out for walls and stuff, Adam sensing people and aliens long before Shiro sees them  
-I really don't even care what happens here but the gist of it is they find the Atlas eventually, Voltron comes to save the day with backup which I guess if the MFE pilots even though James still smells like hot dog water  
-also, Haggar is fucking dead if you haven't figured it out yet. Bob took over the entire Galra gladiator ship.   
-despite everything, both Adam and Shiro are alive, and Adam can't stop smiling.  
-He meets the rest of the Paladins back on the Atlas. His first comment is on how much bigger Keith feels. Lance is all "YEAH I KNOW RIGHT??" Hunk shakes his hand vigorously, and when Shiro introduces Pidge as "the smartest Pigeon I know" he immediately knows he's talking about Katie Holt.   
-Adam only leaves Takashi's side when its suggested he take the first shower he's had in literally years.

-I'm assuming the Atlas has bunks to sleep in  
-Adam is trying to take a nap in his real actual bed with real actual fucking pillows  
-but his head is so full of thoughts that he just wants to siphon some of them off.  
-besides, he can't help but feel scared  
-scared that when he wakes up, all of this will have just been a dream, made up by his heartache.  
-but also Bob isn't here anymore to protect him while he sleeps  
-and he knows he'd be able to sense anything coming near his room but he just can't shake the feeling that something might kill him while he's asleep.  
-after a while he decides he can't do this and stumbles out of his room, and grabs onto the first person he can find.  
-it's Hunk  
-Hunk is pretty worried and so when Adam's all "Where's Takashi where's Takashi where's Takashi wh" he's quick to lead Adam to Shiro's room  
-Adam knocks on the door too fast and Shiro opens the door, prepared for an emergency  
-but Adam just holds onto him, shaking, not caring that Shiro's shirtless or that Hunk is awkwardly watching  
-Shiro thanks Hunk, pulls Adam inside, and closes the door behind them.  
-he holds Adam for a few minutes, rubbing his back, smelling his hair that had just been washed, softly telling him, "Hey, hey it's okay,"  
-Adam asks if he can stay with Shiro  
-he says of course, because how the hell could he say no?  
-Adam asks if he and Shiro could maybe try their relationship again  
-he says yes, because he loves Adam far too much to even think of saying no.  
-for the whole night, they just talk about everything, from Keith to Iverson, space cows to bear traps, prosthetic arms to broken eyes; everything that's changed them both over the several years they've survived.  
-Neither of them feels very lost anymore.


	7. VII

-Adam wakes up, warm and comfortable. It's still dark but everything is quiet and calm. For a second he thinks that the person next to him is the Anathema. He starts to say, "Good god, Bob, you wouldn't believe this crazy awesome dream I just had--"  
-Then he remembers where he is, and starts giggling uncontrollably.   
-Takashi sits up. He kisses Adam's scarred hands, cups Adam's face with his Altean hand. "What's so funny, Love?"  
-Adam kisses his face, cups it in both hands. He wants nothing more than to see him again. "It wasn't a dream."  
-They stay that way for a time, just happy to be in each other's company. 

-Back on Earth, with the help of the Garrison and Altean technology, they start to try and heal Adam's eyes immediately.  
-the thing is, recovery from having your eyeballs damaged from certain Galra weapons and shit takes time.  
-so does healing from the emotional trauma of being stuck in a Galra gladiator pit for a thousand days. Shit like that can really fuck you up.  
-So, for the next year or so Adam and Shiro retire. They still have their bad days, when Shiro can't look at the night sky or Adam realizes he needs therapy because he hates himself for having to kill so many of his fellow prisoners, which wasn't his fault.  
-But they aren't alone anymore.   
-Shiro knows that he's never going back into space. Adam knows he's never going to leave Shiro's side. After about a month, Adam looks at the ceiling and says, "There's a light on. I can see that there's a light on."  
-If you were to look at them, then and now, maybe you wouldn't recognize them as the same men. Shiro has a new arm, white hair, and a scar across the bridge of his nose. Adam laughs more, has blind eyes, and has one long scar cutting diagonally across his face. Both of them have conquered the arena. Both are Champions.  
-The lovers retire and heal,  
-together.

 

 

[BONUS/EPILOGUE]:  
-It's been almost a full year since treatment on Adam's eyes began, and he can almost see everything but it's all really really blurry.  
-but then he's chillin with the squad, chatting about cats which somehow leads the conversation to his vision.   
-he announces, "Yeah, you know, it's probably back to where it was before I lost my sight, back when I needed..."  
-he stops, in deep revelation.  
-turning to his fiance, he shouts, "GLASSES. GLASSES, TAKASHI I NEED GLASSES."  
-everybody's scrambling around the apartment, trying to find Adam's glasses when Matt finds a spare behind the couch, of all places  
-It's covered in dust but they wipe it off. Adam closes his eyes, his heart beat-boxing in his chest.   
-he puts on the spare, faces Takashi, and opens his eyes  
-his mouth falls open  
-and Adam thinks he's falling in love all over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, kids! I really hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it. Please tell me if you want me to continue with this AU!


End file.
